This may sound somewhat callous and I certainly do not mean to make light of anyone’s situation; but I must say suffering is an individual’s choice. If you, I or anyone is suffering, we are choosing that path or direction. Our perspective dictates the direction we go in life. Now when tragedy falls upon us, perhaps a life-altering event such as a terminal or debilitating diagnosis or a failed relationship or house fire etc occurs, of course there is ultimately suffering involved. Anyone who feels anything will experience suffering to some degree. The key is, for how long will one suffer? That is a choice and a role everyone must choose in life at some time or another. When a person chooses to live in a state of victimhood, this creates a path of self absorbed energy that others will ultimately find draining and debilitating to be around and people will cut ties with that individual. If you are living this behavior and life choice then you must be getting something out of it. Ask yourself what rewards you are receiving out of playing the role of a victim. Humans only do things ultimately for the reward or feelings they receive from an act at the conclusion of it. Does it make you feel loved? Does it make you feel worthy or important? Does it bring you attention from others or the world?
Using the HIV scenario, all I can say is regardless how it was contracted this is the individuals reality and now he/she has to deal with it. Ultimately accept it and find a resolution and peace of mind with it (only if they want a productive and purposeful life mind you). The individual has to stop focusing on their self-absorbed view of being a victim and perhaps turn their focus to helping other people stricken with the same disease or who may be worse off from another reality. By focusing or helping another, we find the shortest and truest road to healing and recovering ourselves. The only and true reason or purpose behind suffering is, the reason or purpose you or each of us individually assign it!